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I’m not a teacher, or even a mom who spends time with kids who aren’t mine, so my experience with what’s “normal” in elementary grades is a bit vague. My son, a 4th grader, has had certain struggles, but teachers have always been positive and optimistic, even as he has seemed to fall behind.
Now, with distance learning, I can see all the various ways he avoids doing what’s hard for him. He likes school — even Zoom school, amazingly. He participates. But if he can avoid anything that has to do with writing, he will. And it has me concerned.
Apparently, I’m not alone.
A recent survey, commissioned by Understood.org and YouGov, found that 69% of parents have become more aware of the challenges their child faces in school than before the pandemic, and more than a third have noticed changes in their child’s behavior. And that’s what prompted Understood to do something about it.
What are you looking for?
Some kids have pronounced delays and very clear struggles with, say, reading, but others are in what Amanda Morin, writer and senior expert for family advocacy and education at Understood, calls the “squishy” area. Things feel a little off, to a parent or caregiver or even a teacher, but there’s not (yet) a diagnosis. Or the child happens to be very skilled at strategizing around a problem area in class, so we are only just seeing little symptoms crop up now that class is happening 10 feet away from us at home.
All of which is to say, a learning difference can be hard to spot.
The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has some general things to watch out for, for school-aged children and teens.
Is it difficult for them to:
- follow directions?
- get and stay organized at home and school?
- understand verbal directions?
- learn facts and remember information?
- read, spell, or sound out words?
- write clearly (may have poor handwriting)?
- do math calculations or word problems?
- focus on and finish schoolwork?
- explain information clearly with speech or in writing?
(The developmental milestones are a bit different at the preschool level.)
What can you do?
If some of the above feels all too familiar, there’s a great way to dig a little deeper. This fall, Understood partnered with the AAP to develop a tool — more like a memory device — to help families spot signs of possible learning differences or ADHD in their kids.
It’s called Take N.O.T.E. — and it’s available online for free, in both English and Spanish.
N is for Notice. As a parent, this is probably what you’re already doing. You’re seeing the frustration, upset, struggles, or avoidance.
O is for Observe. This is where parents are empowered to do something. Take N.O.T.E. offers a way to track where, when, and how often learning issues are cropping up. It’s like being a data scientist, only the subject is your child.
T is for Talk. Those detailed observations are vital for this, the next step — to talk. Talk to your teacher, other caregivers and family members, and also your child about what you are seeing. It’s simply more information-gathering, just from other POVs.
E is for Engage. This is where you assemble your team: school staff, specialists, and especially your pediatrician. Together, you can discuss your findings and make a plan.
What the experts say
“We began looking at Take N.O.T.E. about a year ago, pre-pandemic,” Morin says. It was a way to capture parents who suspected their child might be struggling, but didn’t yet have the words — like dysgraphia, or dyscalculia — to describe it. And in many ways, the tool is a reframing of the work Understood has been doing from the beginning. The pandemic just underscored how important this kind of tool can be right now.
“As a parent, what you know is the child you have in front of you,” Morin says. But most parents don’t know the early signs of reading trouble, or math trouble. “We’re not teachers — most of us at least.”
The tool is meant to empower parents to trust their instincts around potential learning or behavioral issues — whether or not, in the end, there’s a diagnosis.
“With behavioral and mental health issues and learning differences, there’s not a blood test, there’s not a throat swab, there’s no imaging,” says Dr. Nerissa Bauer, a behavioral pediatrician in Indianapolis and spokesperson for the AAP. “Kids react so much to what’s going on in their environment. Some kids are reacting to the stress of adjusting to a new normal, but we don’t want to miss the kids who have something else going on.”
She adds, “I tell my families that no question, no concern is not important. If you have a gut feeling, tell me about it. Trust your parental radar. You’re the one advocating for your child.”
