9 Ways for Your Kid to Connect With Their Classmates While Virtual Learning

Six months into this pandemic, and my kids are still virtual learning — and plan to be for at least the fall quarter. In many ways, I’m fine with that. We’ve established new routines and rhythms. We’ve found our little workspaces. We’ve relaxed rules around phones and Fortnite so they can eke out some non-Zoom connection with their online classmates during the week.

But every few days, one of the kids gets vocal about missing friends amid all this online learning. So it pays to have a few ideas for social connection up your sleeve.

How to help your preschooler connect with their online classmates

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Many preschoolers are perfectly OK without Zoom; but then again, they desperately need to play.

1. The virtual playdate
Whether it’s Zoom or FaceTime, getting preschoolers connected via video is skill-building for their digital future. Younger kids will need an adult nearby to facilitate parallel play, like building blocks or playing with similar toys. Older kids might be able to play a simple board game. (You have to move your virtual friends pieces, though).

Know that it might be frustrating at first, so keep your expectations low and playdates short. “Virtual playdates are better than no playdates!” psychologist Maurice Elias, director of Rutgers University’s Social-Emotional and Character Development Lab, told NJ.com. “We can’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. Children have a need to connect.”

2. The socially distant playdate
Six feet apart and masked, you can make certain outdoor activities work really well — at least, while the weather is nice. In the summer, side-by-side slip and slides helped pass sunny afternoons. Socially distant bike rides or scootering work, too.

How school-age kids and their friends can connect during virtual learning

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For school-age kids, play is still important — but learning how to be social matters, too.

3. Regular old phone calls
You’d be surprised how what little knowledge kids have about phone etiquette, from greetings to asking the most basic questions like, “How are you?” and “What did you do today?” My son, for instance, is a master at Siri, but didn’t know how to dial a full phone number.

For kids (and parents!) who think virtual playdates are the worst, a quick, impromptu phone call can lower the stakes — and provide a valuable skill.

4. Messenger Kids
Good Morning America calls Facebook's Messenger Kids "social media training wheels” — which is either a good or bad thing, depending on your POV as a parent. In Messenger Kids, parents approve all contacts and can see all conversations. Plus, there are built-in filters for things that aren’t child-appropriate. And for online classmates, it's a way to re-create that feeling of hanging out.

5. Laser guns
I bought a four-pack of laser guns, and it’s been a fantastic way to meet online classmates in person, in a wide-open space, with masks on and on separate picnic blankets, to let them run and play.

6. Snail mail
You can practice handwriting and the lost art of letter-writing and save the postal system by buying stamps! Plus, there is nothing better — or now, more novel — than receiving something special in the mail.

Keeping tweens and teens engaged with friends during virtual learning

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It’s pretty hard to keep tweens and teens from socializing, especially if they already text or are on social media. There are other ways, however, to help them connect with online classmates.

7. The walk
The strictures of social distancing have brought back some of the more wholesome ways of hanging out — like taking a walk together. My tween often meets her best friend to stroll on a nearby hiking trail. It’s masked and distanced, but it’s still social.

For a variation on a theme, it’s a picnic on separate blankets and then a socially distanced walk.

8. The Netflix party
Netflix Party is a Chrome extension that lets kids watch the same thing on Netflix together, while no doubt chatting in several text chains and group texts together.

9. Fantasy football
Catherine Mackay is president and COO at Amplify, a digital-first educational publisher based in Brooklyn, New York, but she is also mom to school age kids. One of her kids’ schools set up a school-wide fantasy football league — with teachers, administration, and kids all participating. “I think I would have been dismissive six months ago,” Mackay told mom.com, “but now I value it.”

The point is to create a sense of community and a common experience for online classmates as well as their families, absent being on campus together. “It’s not an academic activity, but it is providing a common experience that is enriching," she said.