
“I’ll only be in Chicago for five days,” I replied to my 7-year-old son, as he anxiously watched me pack my suitcase. “And grandma will be here with you the whole time. And, yes, we can totally FaceTime before bed — every night — I promise.”
The reassurance that he would be with someone he loved and the gift of technology seemed to quell my son’s worry about my pending departure. By now, I thought he would be used to it. I travel often without my kids, every few months at least, but each time he sees my black carry-on appear, he peppers me with questions.
Seeing that I am his primary caregiver, I completely understand. I’m upsetting his routine and he’s the type of kind who lives for routine. But his hesitancy over my travel doesn’t compel me to stay. In fact, it pushes me to go. We both need this.
I don’t travel for work, but a few times a year I scoot away for a few days with my husband or a girlfriend for some reprieve. I need a break from mom life and I don’t feel guilty admitting that. So, for my sanity and thus my family’s well-being, I make it happen.
You see, I’m a work-at-home, homeschooling mom. Basically, I’m with my kids 24/7 and I love it. I wouldn’t trade my circumstances for anything. Just the same, I’m human. No one can do a job, even one they love, nonstop around the clock without an occasional reset.
So, I plan girls' weekend getaways and watch for screamin’ deals on flights to cities I want to explore. I keep our monthly budget in check and make sure there is always a little allocated for travel savings. And then, I go. I leave my kids with my husband, mom, or sister, and I take a few days to reclaim who I am as a woman outside of my responsibilities as a wife and mother.
To some, it may seem selfish. To me, it’s absolutely essential. And so, I’ll shout far and wide, that yes, I’m a mom who travels without her kids.
Here’s exactly why:
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
I adore my kids. Always have. Always will. But sometimes being apart makes us appreciate one another more. When I return from a trip, their annoying antics are once again enduring and last month when I got back from Chicago, my son couldn’t stop thanking me for how “extra good” my version of mac ‘n' cheese is.
Sleeping through the night makes me feel young again
I’ve been pregnant or nursing for a decade now. The ebb and flow of early parenting means my sleep is often interrupted. By often, I mean every night. Whether I’m away for one night or seven, sleeping through the night makes me feel young again. Sleep truly rejuvenates, who knew?
Eating alone makes food taste better
Today, for lunch, I served peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and apple slices to my four kids. My 2-year-old informed me that his sandwich was “weally gwoss” and then proceeded to climb across the table and devour my PB & J while sitting on my lap. In stark contrast, when I’m on vacation, not only do I skip kid-friendly fare, I don’t have to share! I swear, eating alone — or in the company of just adults — makes food taste WAY better.
Hearing myself think is refreshing
Chatting with my kids is one of my favorite pastimes. I love answering their questions and helping them process how the world works. But when I travel alone, it’s just me, myself, and I. I can actually hear myself think! And boy, is it refreshing! There is just nothing like being able to think in a complete sentence without interruption.
Solo/adults-only time makes me a better mom
I don’t say it lightly when I say that I felt called into motherhood. The life I have now is the life I dreamed of, and I know without a doubt that I will consider these my golden years. But that doesn’t mean I have the capacity to mother nonstop.
For me, I know that a break every now and again is necessary for me to be the best mom I can be. And that is why I travel without my kids on occasion. I take a break for me so I can be better for them.