Memorial Day weekend, which marks the unofficial beginning of summer, is here. While the nicer weather and the fact school is winding down for my kids is exciting and feels like a crack of light in this dark time, it’s going to be a summer we’ve never experienced before.
My daughter is wondering how we will celebrate her June birthday. All the fairs, parades, and festivals they love so much have been called off. The beaches may or may not open. So, there goes all the things we love that make our long northern Maine winters seem worth it.
At first, I was in deep dread not knowing what the summer would bring. But now I know it’s pretty much canceled, I’ve decided to make some rules for my kids so here they are:
Dear kids, this summer…
1. We will have fun.
Maybe it won’t be the kind of fun we are used to. We won’t be going to water parks or make our way in the air-conditioned movie theater to eat buttery popcorn and smuggle in chocolate. But we can still have fun. After all, it’s a state of mind and this pandemic is showing us how fast events and material things can be taken away.
I want to teach my kids they can’t always control their circumstances, but they can change their perspective.
2. You will play games with me.
We will play in the backyard, bust out the board games, and watch the clouds morph into animals.
We will not stare at the screen all day and say it’s because there’s nothing else to do.
3. We will complain.
Complaining is allowed. This sucks and we need to vent about it.
But there will be a complaining cap. Then we will get back to the games.
4. There will be lots of ice cream.
I can’t control if your favorite ice cream stand will be open, or if I’ll want to be standing there in the July heat wearing a mask while you all wait in the car.
But I will promise a freezer full of ice cream at all times. I don’t even care if you eat some for breakfast. Pinky swear.
5. We will be sad.
We will be missing things we used to do, and we will be missing friends and family. We are allowed to have these feelings and I won’t try to paint a pretty picture and gloss over feelings (including my own), or tell you to cheer up.
Life isn’t about being happy all the time. It’s about living. And when you are alive, you get sad.
6. You will keep up with chores.
Maybe this summer will be a free-for-all When it comes to the ice cream, but let’s keep our best looking nice and not use this as an excuse to not pick up after ourselves.
We’ll be spending most of our time here and I don’t want to be looking at crap all day. You don’t want that for me, either. Trust me.
7. You will be thankful for the things we can do.
We can complain and be sad, but we can also be thankful we have a yard to play in, food to eat, and places we can walk. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.
8. We will eat takeout every Saturday.
Every Saturday afternoon we will vote on a place to eat, get takeout, and have a car picnic. No exceptions.
9. We will have compassion.
We will hold space to be gentle with each other. Just because you are having a bad day, it doesn’t mean you have to take everyone else on the family down with you.
And if your brother, sister, or mother is struggling, be understanding and see what they need instead rubbing salt in their wound.
10. We will be allowed to make mistakes.
It’s OK if we run out of ice cream because I didn’t buy enough. It’s OK to say something you don’t mean. It’s OK to say the wrong thing to a friend. It will all be OK.
This situation has shown us what’s truly important and that it doesn’t do any good to sweat the small stuff.
The way I see it, if we made it through the late winter and spring spending this much time together while living in uncertainty, summer will be a breeze if we follow these rules.
Love,
Mom
