If you're a parent, there's a good chance that you've felt lonely and isolated as a result. Well, you're not alone in that feeling. A new study from The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center showed that 66% of parents feel that the demands of parenting make them feel lonely and isolated. This is certainly validating.
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Researchers polled 250 parents between the ages of 30 and 49 for the study, which is a small amount, but revealed that the experience is universal. Additionally, 62% of the parents who participated feel burned out by their parental responsibilities. Lack of support is another issue, with 38% of parents sharing that they have no support.
"Loneliness has been shown to affect both your physical and mental health," Kate Gawlik, DNP, associate clinical professor at The Ohio State University College of Nursing and a researcher on parental burnout, said in a press release about the study. "So anything from cardiovascular disease to depression, anxiety, cognitive decline, even your immune system can be affected when you're lonely. In fact, one study showed if you are in social isolation for a prolonged amount of time, it's equivalent to smoking about 15 cigarettes a day."
Creating connections are important to parents' health as well. Seventy-nine percent of the parents who participated in the study admitted that they would like to find ways to connect outside of work or the home. "To have somebody that you can relate to and that feeling of connection that somebody else is dealing with what you are dealing with can be so powerful when it comes to combating feelings of loneliness," Gawlik said. She suggested finding ways to connect with other parents and adults, like playgroups, book clubs, or recreational sports.
"It can be hard to start seeking out connections because, to some degree, you will have to be vulnerable and, sometimes, it will take time and effort," she said.
Nowhere in Gawlik's comments did she address the major structural issues that can contribute to parents feeling lonely and isolated from other adults. So many parents have demanding jobs and very little downtime, which makes it hard to plan outings. How many of us have booked a night out with a friend three months in advance because that's the only time you can find that works for both of you? Our kids have equally demanding schedules now, not to mention various after-school commitments. Plus, everything can be expensive.
A night out can cost hundreds of dollars between activities and childcare costs. Addressing some of those issues is one way to allow parents the opportunity to make meaningful connections and combat burnout.
