What to Know
We hear so much about how hard it is being a step-parent — and it is, no doubt — but it’s always nice to see a video that shares the flip side of the co-parenting coin. In a heartfelt and honest video, one stepmom shares why it’s so important for her to clean her stepdaughters’ rooms right after they leave, and how she’s healing and breaking her own generational trauma.
Instagram user @mrssmiithy recently went viral for her video, which shows her lovingly cleaning the girls’ bedroom from top to bottom. She says she grew up with “nothing,” and that her childhood was filled with “abuse and chaos.”
In the video, she opens up about how much she loves her stepdaughters and how she shows it as a “symbol of everything I wished I had growing up.”
She cleans her stepdaughters’ rooms every time they’re away so they always come back to a clean, safe place.
No passive-aggressive commentary. No “they should be grateful.” Just care and unconditional love. She shares that she grew up without the kind of stability she’s now intentionally creating for these girls. Suddenly, the act of cleaning a bedroom becomes something much bigger.
“I think the point here is the love and care being shown by cleaning and preparing their room for next time, of course they can clean their own room, but this is something she is doing for them to make them feel loved and cared for,” one of the top comments reads.
And it’s so true. Instead of resentment or obligation, she talks about gratitude. About how lucky she feels to be their stepmom. Sometimes love looks like fresh sheets, picked-up floors, and a child walking back into a room that says, You were missed. You are safe here.
“These girls mean the world to me,” mrssmiithy says. “And I will always make sure they feel loved, secure, and cherished.”
In the comments, it’s clear this message really resonated with parents.
Another step mama shared her thoughts, writing, “This right here. As a step mama to my amazing son, I would do ANYTHING for this little boy.”
Someone else touched on how the boy’s mama must feel, too, writing, “I bet this is such a relief for their mom, knowing when they’re apart they’re cherished and cared for by a wonderful bonus mom.”
Other comments included in the thousands left on the video read, “Meanwhile I can be your mom and love you to pieces! You are an incredible person and are so much to be proud of,” “I love this for you and I love this for them,” “My ‘step’ mom is the only reason I got to see how it was to be loved properly by a mother. She’s the reason I am the mother I am to my own daughter. I’m 36 years old and don’t remember a moment without her in my life,” and “You broke the cycle already. You love them take care of them. That’s what Moms do.”
All kids deserve love, and how special this one is!
