Yes, I’m Proud of Having Birthed Children But I Still Want My Flat Stomach Back

Before kids, I wasn’t very fit. I wasn’t unhealthy, but I definitely didn’t have “body goals.” I don’t think I even owned a scale back then. I was trim though, in that pre-kid kind of way. My stomach was smooth and curvy and I wore a bikini without worry.

Then kids happened. And my mom bod arrived.

Over the last nine years, I’ve grown and birthed four children. Shall I repeat? In less than a decade, I have CREATED FOUR AMAZING HUMANS! I’ll forever wear that badge of honor. I am Mom, hear me roar. This is all that matters, right? Not my weight, not the width of my hips, not the stretch marks that are scattered across my belly.

But now, more than ever, I find myself working really hard to be the best me I can be — inside and out. I want to do it for me and I want to set a good example for my kids, too.

As I enter my mid-30s, I’m working to better understand my personality and how I respond in situations. I’m spending time in prayer and meditation. I’m aiming to be mindful of the words I use and I’m striving to tame my short fuse. These are all things that matter most, they’re making me a better wife and a better mom.

Am I vain for wanting a flat stomach? Should I let it go and accept my body as it has settled into motherhood?

In partnership with these mind and spirit aspirations, I’ve found my physical wellness increasing in importance. In fact, it has become key to my mental clarity and energy levels to take care of my body. I’m working out regularly, and I’ve become more aware of how my body looks and feels. Because, yes, with all the time I spend exercising and all the sweat I drip, I want to see some results.

Call me crazy, but I’m here to confess that after four kids, I want my flat stomach back. Not rock-hard abs, not even pre-kid abs, but something toned, something I can be proud of.

As much as I admire my tiger stripes and rippled skin, I’d love to have a flat and toned midsection. I’d love to lose that final layer of pregnancy pudge and once again rock a bikini.

Am I vain for wanting a flat stomach? Should I let it go and accept my body as it has settled into motherhood?

Maybe? I go back and forth on this. Because, truly, I’m happy with my body. I’m proud of it. It has done hard things throughout pregnancy, birth and beyond. But, working out has given me a taste of what could be. This body of mine is a powerhouse and it can do amazing things. It has grown and birthed an 11-pound baby and it has run a 10K race. So, why can’t it build and show off a little muscle?

Recently, I added an ab routine into my weekly rotation of workouts. Girl, planks are hella hard — so are V-sits and crunches. But I’m giving it a go.

If my next phase in life is the mom with flat abs, who's to stop me?