You know those annoying people who refer to their pets as their children and consider themselves mothers even though they have no actual human babies in their care? Hi, it’s me — at least, that’s who I was before my daughter was born. My dog and two cats were my whole world, and when I got pregnant, I was even more emotionally attached to all three of them than I had ever been (thanks, hormones). But immediately, people began to warn me: “You just won’t love them the same way after your baby is here.”
I knew that I would love my baby when she arrived — that was a given. But would having an actual human child diminish the love I had for my furry kids, too?
My animals have always been part of my family
Probably more so than a lot of other pets, I’d say. All three of them crowd into bed with my husband and I every night. Our dog goes on vacation with us, and on her first birthday, she had a full-blown photo shoot to celebrate. I even wear a necklace with all three of their faces and names engraved on a charm. And after I found out I was pregnant, it’s like the pets knew, too. The dog, a big, lovable boxer and pitbull mix, became ultra-protective of me, and our cats loved to snuggle up next to my belly.
I’ve always loved animals, and I can’t imagine a home being complete without a pet. When people would ask, “What if the baby is allergic to them?” I would say, “Well, then she has to go. They were here first.”
Other parents told me my pets would become annoying to me after my child was born
With a newborn in the house, they’d say, everything your pets do will become a little more annoying. The dog barking could wake the baby up. The cat hair could get on her clothes and her blankets. You’ll love your baby so much you won’t have time for them anymore.
It made me cry to even think about it. Of course I was excited to become a mom to a human, but these pets had filled my life with so much love. I couldn’t imagine ever feeling a different level of caring for them that I did — what if they were right?
Now that my daughter is here, it's a different kind of love
After my daughter arrived, I learned about a new kind of love — the kind that everyone tells you that you don’t get to experience until you become a parent for the first time. It was life-changing. It’s unbelievable how much I loved this little person for no reason at all. I didn’t have to get to know her. I didn’t have to love her because she had a good sense of humor, or because she was kind to others, or because she was smart. I didn’t know if she was any of these things. I didn’t know who she was or what she would be. I just loved her.
I love my daughter in a way that I would lay down my life for her, no questions asked. It’s not quite the same way that I love my pets, but that doesn’t mean that I love them less than I did before. They’re still my “kids,” and I still defend all the Dog and Cat Moms out there. If you care for another living being, you can call yourself their mom. Pets are hard work!
My pets are still part of the family and always will be
All three of my pets still sleep in my bed every night. My cats still cuddle up next to me on the couch when I settle in to watch This Is Us on Tuesday nights, and my dog is still my fierce and loyal protector — even though I’m not pregnant anymore, she still follows me all over the house. We’re still best friends. And while my patience (and my energy) is much thinner these days with a baby in the house, I love them as much as I always have, and now I get to watch my daughter shriek with delight when the dog comes running into the room, tail wagging, happy to see her.
So when people tell you you might not love your pets anymore after your baby is born, feel free to ignore them. There’s enough love in your heart to go around — and it’s totally possible to be a mom to your dog and your baby, all at the same time.