You'll Have to Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is
Studies show conflict about money can be a major cause of unhappiness for couples, and there's no greater test of your fiscal compatibility than living together. If you say you always pay rent on time, this is when you have to make your word as good as gold. Now that you'll be splitting a variety of costs, be sure you both talk through each of your spending habits, financial goals and responsibilities, and how much you are willing to pay for things. Trust us, it'll save a lot of stress (and fighting) later.
You'll Be Up in Each Other's Bathroom Business
It is a truth universally acknowledged that you and your partner will have different bathroom habits and different limits for grossness. One of you may like showering in the morning and the other at night (if you even get to shower because, you know, kids). One of you might use an insane amount of toilet paper. The other might be really adamant about using the damn squeegee to dry the shower. And there's no point in wondering whether or not your partner can hear you pooping. (Newsflash: He can.)
Be prepared to know everything about each other, especially when sh*t hits the fan.
You'll Crave Alone Time
Now that you'll be spending almost every. single. waking. second together, it's natural to want to have time to yourself. You might want to leave the house for a few hours, or maybe you'll sit with your partner for an entire night silently doing your own thing. Giving each other some space is healthy.
You'll Also Crave Each Other's Company
Couples who live together can also get stuck in loops, and your daily routines can get really boring. There will be times when you'll miss your partner and feel like you haven't made enough time for each other, especially if kids are involved.
So try something new! Studies show couples who try new things regularly and make time for fun activities have happier relationships.
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Sex Won't Be the Same
Sex might start feeling less exciting, more routine and even less frequent. Maybe it's because you're seeing each other every day or have more chances to be intimate than before, or maybe it's because you're both now very present in the other's day-to-day emotions. All these factors can change your sex chemistry in fundamental ways.
If you are not happy with how things go, be sure to talk about it openly with your partner. Research shows couples who have more sex have a higher level of relationship satisfaction. So don't ignore it!
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Ikea Will Test Your Relationship
Every new couple who moves in together must go to Ikea. It's just a rule. The thing is, your first trip together will make or break your relationship. (Just kidding, the children will).
You may not like his affinity to red and he might think your modern furniture is the least comfortable thing on the planet. And then you have to assemble the damn things together, which will most likely lead to a blow out. Even the Wall Street Journal says so, so it must be true.
That's because underlying relationship issues bubble to the surface as couples attempt to choose furniture. "I've had couples go to the mat over a couch that neither of them even liked," marriage counselor and radio host Dr. Jane Greer told the WSJ. "Underneath, every discussion is really about how important am I to you?"
You'll Want to Talk About Screen Time Habits Before Bed
Some people hate screen time before bed (apparently that phone's glow can be really annoying to someone trying to sleep). But other people need those few minutes (OK, maybe an hour) unwinding and scrolling through Instagram or the day's news before getting some shut-eye. Now that you'll have someone sleeping next to you every night, if you and your partner have different preferences, be sure to talk about it (yes, communication is a huge theme here).
Chores Won't Feel Fair
Set ground rules sooner rather than later. It might be an awkward conversation at first, but it's one that'll make things go much more smoothly in the future. Talk about how you'll divide responsibilities and revisit the list every once in a while. Complete balance may not be possible. Studies continually show parenting is a lot harder on moms and working moms do more at home than working dads (which totally has to change!) But it's also important to remember some days one of you will have to give more than the other.
There's Another Mouth to Feed
Having a partner at home can be a blessing in disguise. There's another mouth to feed and more food to buy, but now there are two of you to help get dinner ready or take turns to keep the hangry kids at bay. Plus, grocery shopping will be both easier and cheaper. Instead of cooking two separate dinners, now that you live in the same home, you can split the costs and buy in bulk. (Costco samples here you come!)
Say Goodbye to Your Closet Space!
Unless you're moving into a bigger place, the reality is you're going to have to give up some stuff (not the shoes!) because closet and dresser space will be limited. We know, we know. It'll be one of the toughest things you ever do. Just remember, it's OK if you need a good cry.
Hair, Hair, Everywhere!
For some reason, when two people start living together, the amount of hair all over the house compounds exponentially. There will be hair all over the bathroom floor, sometimes on walls, maybe even stuck under your sock. Just resign yourself now to the fact that it will never be possible to rid your home of all stray hairs.
You'll (Almost) Never Be Locked Out
Now that there are two sets of keys and two adults in the house, gone are the days when you screw up your entire morning because you locked and closed the door just before you remembered you left your keys on the table. You can breathe a sigh of relief and take that locksmith off speed dial!
You Will Have Thermostat Wars
You've fought this out in the office, now you'll be fighting this at home too. Different people are used to different temperatures and home conditions. For example, some would rather melt into a puddle before turning on the AC while others can only survive with the AC on night and day. The contrast is especially drastic when it comes to women vs. men. According to a study in Nature Climate Change, women typically prefer warmer temperatures because their metabolic rates are slower. So when thermostats are set to what males prefer, women are often colder (and angrier).
You May Have to Rethink What Shows You Watch
Living with your partner means you'll have someone to share TV shows and movies with. (Even if he won't admit it, he's secretly watching "Gilmore Girls" when you have it on and not "doing a crossword puzzle.") But sometimes, your entertainment preferences may be so different you'll find yourself compromising on whose show is more important to watch and when.
You’ll Adopt Each Other’s Habits
Couples who live together tend to change each other's habits. You might stay up a little later because he's a night owl or he'll start going to the doctor regularly because you do. While living together can promote good habits, a 2011 study found that the effects aren't always so healthy. One partner's bad habits can enable the other's.
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You'll Discover Each Other's Quirks
Your partner will take "make yourself at home" more seriously because now, it is his new home! All his little quirks will unravel for you to see, and there are some he just can't get rid of. He might like to wash all the dishes before eating or pop his zits before bed. Some of it may get on your nerve, and others you'll find so weird you can't help but laugh. (Now someone please tell my husband I can't stand it when he breathes in my space.)
You Will Change Each Other's Diets
Maybe he likes putting time into home cooked meals but you're the takeout queen, or maybe he's a pasta lover and you're an egg noodles gal. By moving in together, you're bringing together two different food systems and preferences. A study by Newcastle University showed diets tend to change because partners try to please each other. Needless to say, how and what you eat will change.
You'll See the Good, the Bad and the Hairy
The longer you live together, the more comfortable you and your partner will feel around each other emotionally and physically. You'll both let loose little by little, until one day, you realize you haven't shaved your legs in weeks, and he's stopped styling his hair. Hey, it's the inside that counts, right?
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You'll Have a Ride to the Airport
Even if all hell breaks loose, one big positive of living with your partner is you'll always have a ride to and from the airport. Yes, even through crazy holiday traffic. If he loves you, he will do it. After all, you know where he sleeps.
