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By now, most of us grasp the gravity of the pandemic and understand social distancing is crucial to slow the spread of the coronavirus. Many schools have closed for the rest of the school year and are devising solutions using technology to provide continuity of education for all students, as well as additional support for special needs students. However, parents — in looking for things to do with kids at home — may be tempted to arrange playdates at their houses.
Please don’t.
“Social distancing is important to protect yourself from getting the virus and protect yourself from spreading it to others,” pediatrician Dr. Steph Lee explained to Mom.com. “The latest data suggest up to 25% of people can be infected with the new coronavirus, but lucky enough not to show symptoms,” she clarified. “However, they can still spread the virus to others.”
How families are using technology and kids chat apps for playdates
Dr. Lee reminded us, “Social distancing does not mean social isolation.” Many families who are fortunate enough to have consistent internet access and devices such as phones, tablets, and computers have used messaging and conference call apps like Zoom, Google Hangouts, FaceTime, Facebook Messenger for Kids, Skype, WhatsApp, or Marco Polo to connect their children with each other.
“My girls spend at least an hour playing with my sister’s kids,” said Roodlyne Mason to Mom.com. “We’re doing WhatsApp video calls with family members.”
Some are playing online games or taking classes together. “My 12-year-old and 21-year-old are doing video games online with friends,” Anitra Durand Allen told us. “My 15-year-old is taking virtual arts classes with her friends.”
“My kid and her friends are doing FaceTime calls more than anything,” another mom of a teenager Toya Smith said. “Lots of watching movies/shows at the same time and texting or video chatting about them.”
As you would do with a playdate that takes place in person, be vigilant and check in on your child’s online activity. Make sure that younger kids are supervised. Beware of hackers taking advantage of this time to “crash” Zoom meetings — often posting profanity, graphic videos, or inappropriate content. You can take precautions such as:
- Use a single use ID for that particular meeting.
- Enable the “waiting room” feature so you can see people before allowing them access.
- Disable options allowing others to join before the meeting “host” as well as screen-sharing by others.
- Once everyone is present, lock the meeting to outsiders and assign at least two meeting co-hosts.
Non-tech ways to connect with friends
Not everyone is excited about using apps to connect. “Both kids are not terribly fond of the virtual playdates and frequently turn them down,” mom of two C. Chiang confided to Mom.com.
There are also families such as mine who are not having online playdates during quarantine because, as mom of four Whitney Cornelison summed up, “With four kids, they usually play with one another.”
Other families are mixing high-tech with low-tech ingenuity. “My daughter stands at the end of the driveway while the other neighborhood kids stand at the end of theirs and then they just scream at each other from across the road,” Cris Stone told Mom.com. Because their children are young and can’t comprehend social distancing, “Everyone’s taking turns letting our kids ride bikes and stuff in the street. Every time a kid goes by, my daughter stands on the porch and screams a conversation with them. It’s hilarious.”
Larisha Bernard informed us, “We’ve texted friends while walking or on bike rides. They stand on their porch or at the window with our kids on the sidewalk and yell back and forth.”
Families are also contributing to community morale. “We are leaving notes in our window for the neighbor and vice versa. I do it with my elderly neighbor also,” mom of two Tomika Bryant shared with us. “We also hosted a group art class via Zoom and it was so much fun.”
Ideas for what to do on playdates during quarantine
While some children are content with just chatting or having friends in the background, other kids may need more. “Create structure in the home — get out of pajamas and still get dressed. This helps you and your kids feel mentally active and ready to take on the day,” advised spokesperson for the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), Dr. Lee. “Schedule activities that keep everyone engaged like arts and crafts, puzzles, or even board games.”
“Our kids are doing FaceTime with cousins and friends as often as possible. Sometimes they draw together and other times they have played American Girl dolls together,” shared Bernard.
Diana Lee told us her kids use Zoom for playdates and birthday chats. “They also use the whiteboard and chat features to draw each other pics and send emojis.”
“Each Friday on Marco Polo, my kids and my best friend’s kids present something they are interested in and/or researched that week,” suggested Darcy Zalewski. “They reply with questions and answers.”
Lastly, don’t forget about physical activity! Having dance parties over video or taking exercise classes can be a fun and healthy way to have a playdate during quarantine, too.
