How to Explain Race to Your Kindergartner

Many parents often feel as though they're doing their child a favor by raising them to 'not see color' and to be 'colorblind.' But, encouraging children to acknowledge differences in people is the first step in fostering a sense of empathy. When brought up to recognize differences between people, they are better prepared to recognize instances of privilege and define discrimination when they see it. This is also the first step in raising a child who is actively anti-racist.

Cindy Ivey, a science teacher and mom of two, explained why she feels it is important to teach young children about race. "When parents raise their children to be ‘colorblind’ they teach them to ignore the very real injustices happening around them," she told Mom.com. "It allows our young people to grow up in a bubble of privilege without ever having to face the uncomfortable truth that this security does not exist for everyone."

If we were to leave the subject of race to peers, teachers, television, and society in general, they may come away with skewed and sometimes dangerous ideas. By not exposing children to people and cultural experiences other than their own, it can create a sense of superiority around one's own background rather than compassion and tolerance for other cultures and worldviews.

Often one of the reasons parents give for not explaining race to young children is that they just don't know how to do so. They may say they don't have the necessary tools to do 'do it right.' In 2021, however, these excuses are unacceptable.

After a racially tumultuous year in 2020, the sheer volume of conversations and resources to help parents talk to children about race and racism has grown exponentially. Use age-appropriate simple language when explaining race to your kindergartner. All too often people tend to shy away from talking about color or race issues with kids for this reason. The bottom line is to make talking about race as commonplace as talking about what you're going to have for dinner.

Erin Winkler, associate professor and chair in the Africology Department at University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, stresses the importance of talking about race with one another. "I think the first thing is to just get comfortable talking about race, racism, racial inequality, period," Winkler said in a talk she gave for Wisconsin Public Television's University Place. "And what I mean is, if we are not able to talk about these issues with other adults, we're going to find it impossible to talk about it in age-appropriate ways with 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9-year-olds or even teenagers."

Introduce your child to a variety of cultural experiences. This is a great way to foster a sense of cultural appreciation. Younger children may not understand some of the vocabulary you might choose to use when explaining race, so it's important to make real-world connections. Use examples that they can understand when you define racism and racial discrimination by making a correlation to something that makes sense in their world.

Discuss with your child the feelings that may arise from being excluded from groups of friends at school. Share examples like the classic, 'what if' scenario using simple terms and examples to define inequality. Have friends of different races other than yourself and model anti-racist behavior so that it is a natural part of your childs upbringing.

Finally, children learn by modeling so it's important to call out racism when it occurs. "Although it can seem counterintuitive, our silence about race can in fact, and does in fact, increase prejudice," Winkler said.

Books like these are a great way to open up a conversation to help you with explaining race to your kindergartner:

Written by Ibram X. Kendi, AntiRacist Baby is a great introduction to race and fairness for young children.

Alexandra Penfold's, All are Welcome helps children recognize and appreciate differences in skin color, culture, and backgrounds and explains how at the heart of it, we're all quite similar.

Something Happened in Our Town: A Child’s Story About Racial Injustice by Marianne Celano, Marietta Collins, and Ann Hazzard approaches the topic of racial injustice as a result of a hate crime and helps to define racial discrimination for young children in a way they can understand.

Making an effort to invite diverse groups of people to your inner family circle and keeping lines of communication open go far to ensure that your child has the tools and support necessary to navigate the world around them. If your child has experienced racism or witnessed discrimination or racism at school, encourage them to talk through their feelings and to speak out against injustices.