As we near the end of 2020, the pandemic rages on and we're all still mostly at home. It's been undoubtedly tough on everyone, especially the kids. For them, this year was all about online learning, a lack of social interactions, and being around the same family members 24/7 — all things that have led parents to wonder about the continued impacts of COVID-19 on their children.
Now, thanks to Dr. Molly O'Shea, a pediatrician at Birmingham Pediatrics Wellness Center, we've got some answers to parents' most common pandemic-related questions.
My kids are fighting and whining all the time — what do I do?
Many times, boredom or attention seeking can lead to sibling in-fighting or whining. Take a step back and see what is driving this behavior – is it happening when you can’t pay attention due to a meeting or cooking? Is it occurring when kids are left along longer periods of time? Does it stop after you intervene and start after you withdraw?
When this is the case, sometimes ignoring the behavior is the best solution – when kids learn they won’t get your attention, it will eventually decrease. A technique called Time-In can help you strike the perfect balance. This consists of spending concentrated, connected time with your child before you need to pull away for a prolonged task — essentially, filling up their tank. If the behavior derives from boredom, consider pre-emptively intervening with an “activity bowl’ of ideas the kids can pull from.
Is it safe to send my child to daycare or school?
Each child’s case needs to be considered individually – their needs, their medical history, the health and well-being of the family, etc. Children can be very adaptable to wearing masks and practicing hand hygiene, but be sure to collect all the information necessary to make an informed decision – what safety precautions is the school taking, how many active cases are in your community, etc.
What safety precautions should I be mindful of in the COVID-19 era?
All of your standard home safety-proofing, choking precautions, and regular health checks remain critical for your child’s safety, regardless of a pandemic.
An unrecognized but equally important safety precaution is drowning prevention – as the American Academic of Pediatrics warns of an increased risk of drowning due to implications from the pandemic. Drowning is the leading cause of accidental death in children ages 1-4 and children can drown in as little as two inches of water – from toilets to bathtubs to buckets and backyard pools. Prioritize water safety and swim lessons for your child, as early as four months old. Seek out a reputable learn-to-swim facility in your area that is prioritizing COVID-19 safety precautions while teaching this lifesaving skill.
Virtual learning is a struggle for my children (and me), and I’m afraid they’re falling behind — what can I do?
Focus less on the rote tasks of school and more on whether your child is actually learning. Monitor their progress across various subjects and keep them engaged by asking about their day off-screen: What was the funniest thing you saw or heard today? Did you hear any new words today? And, share some of your day’s highlights from virtual meetings as well. Speak freely and openly about your days to drive engagement and participation, and remember, leave your kids alone for school – the teacher is there to reel them in if need be.
My child seems to be struggling with anxiety and depression now — how can I help?
It’s no surprise that children are struggling right now. Remember, children often reflect their parents’ emotions, so if you feel you are experiencing anxiety or depression, seek help to manage your feelings too. The first step you can take at home is to shift the way you talk about the virus and the risks. Talk about COVID-19 with confidence that it will be managed and convey to your children that the adults in their life will keep them safe – all they have to do is follow rules about wearing masks, washing hands, and social distancing. Meditation, exercise and being outside in nature also help many people experiencing anxiety and depression, so get out of the house with your children in a safe and socially distanced way. If you find this isn’t enough, talk to your pediatrician about your child’s struggles – sometimes the help of a good therapist and/or medication can go a long way.
Dr. Molly O’Shea is a pediatrician at Birmingham Pediatrics Wellness Center, an American Academy of Pediatrics journal editor, a water safety and drowning prevention advocate, and official pediatrician of Goldfish Swim School.
