Creative Ways to Tell Your Child You’re Expecting

Adding a new member to the family is an adjustment for everyone, specifically for children who will be gaining a sibling. There are a number of ways one can break the news, but the best way is to talk to your child in an age-appropriate manner, use simple and direct language and keep the conversation going long after the big reveal, according to Myisha Driver, a Los Angeles-based expert of infant, family and early childhood development.

According to Driver, the conversation is most important when telling your child that you are pregnant—one-sentence, easy-to-grasp language is always best—but there are plenty of kid-friendly props you can use to facilitate discussion. "For a younger child, use their own dolls or puppets to talk about what's happening and explain that mommy has a real baby in her tummy," says Driver, program director at Los Angeles Child Guidance Clinic. "Dolls are a great way to get the conversation started."

Young children respond exceptionally well to visual tools, says Driver, which is why sitting down with your toddler to watch an age-appropriate video is another effective way to announce that he or she is about to become an older sibling. "There are some great educational and entertaining videos out there," says Driver. "Just remember to be on-hand, ready to answer questions that you child may have."

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Reading books, says Driver, is one of the best ways to break the happy news, especially with a child who is starting to sharpen his early reading skills. “By the age of 4, your child is getting old enough where you can give them a bit more information than you would a 2- or 3-year-old," she says. "Books about becoming a big sister or brother are a great way to start off the conversation. You can also give the book wrapped up as a present to your child."

Flipping through a scrapbook or photo album that you made when your older child was a baby presents a great opportunity to generate excitement about the newborn-to-be. "Look through the scrapbook or photos with your child," suggests Driver. "Talk about what it was like to have one baby in your tummy and what it's like now to have another baby in your tummy." Encourage your child to help you assemble a new scrapbook filled with pictures of you pregnant, baby-inspired drawings, and anything else marking the 9-month journey. "This will help him to feel engaged and part of the experience."

Letting your baby bump speak for itself is often the most practical way to share the news. “Make a family decision about when you will tell your child that you are having a baby," says Driver. "It can be wise to wait until the first trimester has passed, when the risk of miscarriage drops, and you start to show. Explaining miscarriage is an even more difficult conversation." However, Driver also points out that if you are suffering from morning sickness and your child asks, "What's wrong with mommy?" you should always tell the truth.

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Zoos provide an ideal backdrop for that initial baby-on-the-way discussion. "Plan a trip to the zoo, and talk to your children about the baby animals like the ducks or pandas or giraffes," says Driver. "You can talk about how a baby duck will grow up into a big duck and use that as a jumping-off point to talk about your own pregnancy."

Surprising your grade-school aged child with a T-shirt that says "Big Brother" or "Big Sister" is another fun way to share the news, says Driver. "Just make sure to think about whether or not springing a surprise upon your child is the best thing," she says. "What might be good for one child may not be good for another." Always be ready for questions. "Your child may not want a new sibling, so be prepared to talk about his feelings."

A doctor visit where your child gets to watch the ultrasound or listen to the baby's heartbeat will likely be an event to remember. And, with the doctor on-hand to answer any questions, it's bound to be an educational experience. "Make sure to talk to your child before you go to the doctor's office," says Driver. "There should be a conversation about where you are going, and why, and what to expect. The doctor's office should not be the spot of the big reveal. That's much too jarring, and you don't want to scare them into thinking somebody is sick."

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