Moms, May Is the Month Our Brains Want to Explode — but There’s Hope

It’s Wednesday night, and I have at least six unread emails from my kids’ schools. I am so exhausted from all the end-of-school-year festivities that I cannot bring myself to read them and take in more information. Between the permission slips, the send-this-in-tomorrow requests, special dress days, and reminders to finish outstanding assignments, I’m done.

May is the month that the poop hits the fan, year after year, like clockwork. Every one of us has spring fever, but despite chirping birds and warmer temps, we are not free to frolic in the sunshine. If you’re a mom right now, you are working harder than ever before, trying to make sure every last box is checked before your kids are out of school for summer break.

Over my 10-plus years of having children in school, I’ve learned what I need to do to make May go more smoothly. Despite feeling like I’m on the dizzying downhill of a roller coaster ride, I do have some choice in how this month goes.

More empathy, less resistance

Moms, it does very little good to battle your kids right now. They are going to struggle more this month due to the school-is-almost out anticipation and the anxiety that comes with routine changes. We can’t talk our kids out of their feelings, so let’s just meet them where they are. Empathize with their feelings, no matter what they are.

For example, “I know you’re so tired of doing homework. I would be too.” Then offer something to help them. “Do you want to run that paragraph by me?” When in doubt, simply grab them their favorite snack.

Lower your expectations

Remember those cute, balanced lunches you packed your kids from August to April? That’s not happening anymore — and guess what? It’s OK. Scrounge up what you can find in your pantry and fridge, and throw it into their tattered lunch bags. Also, you bought your children plenty of matching outfits for school, but now they’re rotating faded T-shirts and too short pants. This is also OK. As long as your children are fed and dressed, you’re winning.

Say no

This is not the time in your life to perk up and embrace every single opportunity. Maybe you’ve heard this before, but no is a complete sentence. You do not have the extra time or patience for more projects. Yes, I’m giving you permission to do the bare minimum this month for the sake of your own sanity.

Remember that this too shall pass

May is a predictable yet chaotic life season. It’s easy to get caught up in the demands of end-of-year “fun” and become overwhelmed, cranky, and exhausted. This month isn’t forever. May will soon fade into June, and your children (and you) will transition to summer. One thing that helps me is reassuring or reminding myself — out loud. Yes, I said "out loud."

Practice self-care

Self-care seems to be the buzz phrase, one I often roll my eyes at. However, the reality is that practicing some daily self-care during May can be the tweak we need to make it. Write down three practical, quick self-care habits and paste it somewhere visible. Pick one to practice each day. Examples include: exfoliating in the shower, going on a brisk walk, watching an episode of your favorite show, or grabbing a favorite caffeinated drink. These little pick-me-ups can help you get through otherwise stressful days.

This month is going to fly by, with plenty of ups and downs. However, moms who make up their minds can do anything — including getting through the last days of another school year.