Every generation of kids thinks they have it better/worse/easier or harder than the previous, but in my opinion, it's not that easy to compare a whole generation of time and being to another. However, there are some awesome things that I got to do as a kid that my daughter will most likely never experience, and quite frankly, that stinks—for her!
- Making Prank Calls
I'm not sorry in admitting I loved prank calling people. I was damn good at it, and it continued all the way up through college.
But with smartphone technology, sure you can block a number, but it's much easier to get caught. And besides, kids today can tweet, Snapchat and Facebook each other a bunch of nonsense under fake profiles.
Still, there's nothing quite like the thrill of live prank calling.
RELATED: So You're Fat After Having Kids, What's the Big Deal?
- Playing MASH
Our kids will never know how awesome it is to discover your entire future on a piece of paper.
Mansion. Apartment. Shack. House.
Single. Married. Divorce.
How many kids you had.
The game of MASH was a game that could foretell your entire future. Even the kind of car you drove!
I'm still pissed I didn't get the Porsche, mansion and childhood crush husband MASH promised me decades ago. Apparently, MASH couldn't predict my divorce and Honda…
- Pagers
Your kid will never understand how special it was when you received a "Morse code" or special message via your super cool and most likely, huge or brightly colored, pager.
You felt like a doctor or VIP with your pager, otherwise known as a "beeper," even though most likely you were just another punk kid!
- Watching Saturday Morning Cartoons
Instead of running out to every activity under the sun or a gazillion kids' birthday parties, we got to be lazy sloths each Saturday with the best reason to wake up on the planet: Saturday morning cartoons!
We would wake up early and let our parents sleep (lucky, bastards) while we watched cartoon after cartoon and rotted our brains out on some of the best shows ever.
- Attending Candy-Filled School Parties
I know allergies are serious business these days, but some schools don't even let you bring candy to the Halloween parties. What sort of treat are apples and carrot sticks? Sorry, but Goldfish don't come close to holding a candle to even the cheapest of chocolate, like a Hershey's kiss.
These kids don’t know how good we had it! My generation of kids weren't obese and we had school parties that could put some people into diabetic shock. Don't get me wrong—eating healthy is important, but a good school party is good for everyone…well, besides the teachers.
Instead of being taught all the adult aspects of life via social media, we got to watch juicy after-school specials that seemed so taboo and impossible to happen to us.
- Walking to School
Sure, some kids still walk to school, but most do not. And that's unfortunate because there's a lot to be said for walking to school. I made friends, I dealt with a few bad guys and I learned to be aware of my surroundings all while making friends in the neighborhood. Our parents didn't have to set up play dates—we made it happen ourselves!
- Learning About Life From After-School Specials
Instead of being taught all the adult aspects of life via social media, we got to watch juicy after-school specials that seemed so taboo and impossible to happen to us. Our minds were way more naïve. And I liked it that way.
- Being Left Alone in the Car
When our parents ran mind-numbingly boring errands, we could sit in our parent's car and be left alone. We could make faces at the strangers going by and rummage through our parent's car, or tease our siblings to death. Now kids have to be with Mom and Dad at all times, or it's a call to CPS for you!
RELATED: My Mom Criticized My Parenting, But At Least I'm Not Alone
- Wax On
Kids today will never appreciate the proper circular motion needed to efficiently "Wax on and wax off," like Mr. Miyagi did in "The Karate Kid".
Come to think of it, kids don't even know who Mr. Miyagi is, which is pretty damn shameful, isn't it?
- Calling Your Crush on the Phone
Calling your crush's house to talk to him was by far the most excruciating thing ever ("Will his dad or mom answer?") but also the most exciting! Sadly, kids today don't have that thrill. Their crushes have cell phones and most likely, Mom or Dad won't be answering them!
- Being a Babysitter
Back in the day, you could make good dough as a babysitter as young as eleven years old.Now you need CPR lessons, a car, a second language and an early childhood or elementary education degree.
Before, we could skate by on just being slightly "older."
