Real talk: Breast is best, except when it’s not.
I’m speaking from personal experience. As a mom of two back-to-back daughters, I was shamed, questioned, chastized, attacked, berated, and more for simply measuring personal negatives and positives to make a parenting choice that served my whole family best at the time. I opted out of breastfeeding to maintain mental/physical/emotional soundness, and I don’t regret it one bit.
If you’re doing a new mom back-and-forth and trying to make a case to justify opting out — either for yourself or for anyone else attempting to bully you into breastfeeding or bust — here were my top six reasons for why bottle feeding is a no-brainer:
1. I knew my babies would be healthy and fine
Contrary to popular fear-inducing myths, most formula made in the U.S. is safe and nutritious and has been for decades. (Again, breast milk is incomparably optimal for a spectrum of reasons, but that fact does not translate to mean that formula is toxic or damaging to an otherwise healthy baby.) Although they might try to sway you otherwise, ask your pediatician to guide you toward choosing the right formula for your family. Stick with tested, proven, FDA-approved brands to ensure safety. Balance personal risks and trade-offs responsibly (e.g., was your baby born without any health compromises? Does your baby require extra nutrients exclusive to breast milk in order to thrive normally?).
2. My body healed faster
I know a lot of moms who swear by the alleged “tummy-shrinking magic” that hormones released from nursing prompts, and I also know a lot of moms who curse at how that “tummy-shrinking magic” factor turned out to be a crock of poop. My body didn’t produce enough milk to sustain my babies’ appetites for me to test this theory on myself, so I ditched the inevitable drama altogether. Sure enough, I healed regardless — and I wasn’t extra fatigued (from making milk), my nipples weren’t constantly scabbed, and my body was free of physical and mental/emotional pain that often accompanies difficult nursing experiences. An unexpected side effect? Feeling more rested, more capable and in-control during the day.
3. Stress tied to feeding baby was nonexistent
Why? Mostly because I knew exactly how much milk my babies were eating at each feeding. I had no worries about “Am I producing enough? Is baby getting enough?” and that calmed me. Additionally, formula-feeding moms typically feed babies every three hours as opposed to every two, so, yeah, more time to coexist and enjoy baby without constant feeding stress.
4. Formula feeding allows zero excuses for others not to help with baby's mealtime
Find me an exhausted new mom who doesn’t yearn for a break from feeding at least once a day (or in the middle of the night), and I will call BS on you. With breastfeeding, we’re stuck — only mom can feed if we’re breastfeeding. Bottle feeding opens up opportunities for mother-in-laws, husbands, siblings, cousins. or babysitters, so that us moms may briefly reset ourselves. Any chance to reset is life-changing for a new mom.
5. No weaning needed later
Although many moms don’t have issues weaning or flip-flopping between bottle and breast, many do. If you’ve ever known a mom with a baby who won’t take any kind of bottle, you’ll know it can be a most stressful, confusing, and mentally crippling issue to deal with — especially if and when that mom is due to return to work while this push/pull is happening.
6. No leak spots on my blouses
Too vain and shallow? Maybe. Consider this one to also yield a strong economic reason — you’ll avoid the requirement of constantly purchasing countless new, unstainined shirts to replace the ones leaky nipples have ruined.
I stand by these reasons to this day with zero regrets
Moment of truth: My own sister still doesn’t understand how I skipped out on nursing — she didn’t experience any drama or negativity with breastfeeding in her daily life. So, I will offer this on the record here:
If you’ve dreamed of nursing your baby, and it works for you, then do it! Don’t let my reasons for opting out invade your preference.
But for the rest of us who have been on the fence, challenged with an active toddler alongside a newborn, or just plain scared silly to breastfeed for reasons we can’t quite identify, take solace in knowing that formula-feeding is a sound, safe, and smart choice for those of us who might seek it. Case made? Hope so.
