Once your baby is in arms, you, my mama friend, are starting a new journey.
The postpartum days, often called the fourth trimester, are full of joy, tears, LOTS of photos, and, to be frank, bodily fluids. But you have done hard things once before — hello, pregnancy and birth! — and you can totally rock this season of life too.
But, lest you be surprised by some not so joyous parts of postpartum, here are a few words of warning …
Contractions don’t stop when labor ends
I’m not lying. For a few days you’ll continue to have contractions as your uterus returns to its normal size. And yes, they hurt. Some are just a twinge, some you’ll have to breathe through.
Pretty undies should stay in your drawer
Don’t knock the postpartum mesh underwear. They hold giant pads and pad-sicles (pads soaked in a healing blend and frozen to help reduce perineal swelling) perfectly. Wear them proudly and save your pretty undies for a less gory season. Or, better yet, get Depends. (No, really.)
You might not connect with your baby right away
Birth is truly a phenomenal miracle, but when you first meet your baby and even in the days and weeks to come you might feel like that special spark is missing. It’s 100% normal and 100% okay. Your love will grow!
Your first poo is a big victory
Pooping might seem like a small task in light of having just delivered a baby, but mentally pushing again is a real postpartum obstacle — especially since constipation is a common occurrence after birth. It’s such a big deal that they often won’t discharge you until you’ve had your first succesful #2. Pro tip: don’t say no to stool softeners.
Engorgement pain is a 10/10
It’s a different kind of pain than labor and delivery, but nothing compares to full, tender breasts. Be sure you’re connected with a gentle and knowledgeable lactation consultant to help guide you towards the easier breastfeeding days. Many even make house calls and that one-on-one attention without having to pack up and leave home is well worth the investment.
Breastfeeding hunger is unlike any other
I have never been hungrier than when I am breastfeeding. Like, middle of the night “I need a PB & J” kind of hunger. Focus on high protein snacks like quality granola bars and trail mix to keep you sustained while you nurse your little one.
There will be tears — lots of them
Tears of joy, tears of pain, tears of overwhelm. When the waves hit give yourself grace and just try to imagine all the hormone fluctuation you have raging inside your body postpartum. It’s unreal! And, it takes time for your emotions to find a baseline. If you or your partner/support feel like it’s more than baby blues don’t shy away from seeking professional help for postpartum depression. You’ve already proved that you’re strong and often that strength continues in getting help right when you need it.
You’ll still look pregnant
Don’t pack away your maternity clothes once your due date arrives! You’ll want those for weeks (sometimes a few months) after baby. It took nine months to grow your little one and your body needs time to resettle into your new, perfect mom bod during the fourth trimester and beyond.
It takes time to heal
I can almost guarantee that moms who seemingly bounce back a week or two after giving birth have LOTS of volunteer or hired help. From a mama who has survived the fourth trimester four times, believe me when I say that it takes time to heal physically and emotionally. More than you think. Sometimes a year. Especially when you’re caring for other children, managing a home, and/or fulfilling work commitments.
You will still be bleeding
Yes, even after all that giving birth entailed – whether you pushed or had a major abdominal surgery – your body will continue to shed some stuff… hence the mondo pads they give you at the hospital. Don’t be surprised if you continue to bleed for several weeks after coming home.
