She is… breathtaking. I am astonished that a little girl with such perfect curly hair, giant chocolate eyes, and rosy cheeks could come from me. Not that I think I'm ugly, but I think she is transcendent. Of course I'm speaking of my daughter.
One of her favorite things to do in the morning is sit with me and pretend to do her makeup as I do mine. She uses the powder brush on her cheeks and declares, "So pretty!" It's adorable and I love that time we have together, but I also fear that, by watching me go through this routine every day, she will think that this is a necessity of life when you're a woman.
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I've been careful not to talk about makeup as if it made me a better person. She asked me why. "Why makeup, Mommy?" I told her that I put on makeup because I like it. Not because Mommy's face is ugly without it, or because I want to look pretty. Because I like it.
The truth is, I do feel ugly without it. It does feel like a necessity. Sometimes I envy men for not having these sort of expectations on them. And sometimes I do really just wear makeup because I like it. My feelings on the topic change from one day to the next.
So I wonder what my reliance on makeup communicates to my little girl. And what does my reliance on makeup communicate to my little boy about beauty and what a woman should look like?
When I look at my daughter, though, I know that there is absolutely nothing on this planet that could improve upon her beauty. Anything she puts on her face only detracts from that which she's been bestowed. Recently it dawned on me that there was a point about 30 years ago when someone thought the same thing about me. Someone looked at my toddler self, my blue eyes, fair complexion and straight brown hair and thought, "nothing in this world could make her more beautiful."
I know that my mother and father thought this about me, because that's what mothers and fathers do. They see the beauty in their children and to know that to add anything to a masterpiece is to take away from it.
So I wonder what my reliance on makeup communicates to my little girl. And what does my reliance on makeup communicate to my little boy about beauty and what a woman should look like?
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Trust me, I'm not against makeup and I do put it on because I enjoy it usually. But I want to be careful about how I frame the concept for my children, and I want them to see me, regularly, with the face that God gave me.
Unaltered and unedited.
I want to take care of my body in such a way that my eyes are bright and my skin is healthy without the use of concealers and contouring. I want to show them that there are ways to highlight our looks without altering them.
If I want her to know she's beautiful, I need to model that attitude for her.
Photograph by: Getty Images
