Stories We Can Relate To
Sure, the miracle of life and all that. But really? Pregnancy is full of little indignities. You are betrayed by your ever-growing body and held hostage by hormones. Sometimes, though, the gods of pregnancy are on your side. There are some stories that only those who have been there will understand.
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When Nature Calls
“I was very pregnant with my first child, taking a hike—well, more like a mild nature walk—with two other similarly pregnant friends. The dust on the trail started making me cough so badly that [I] peed right through my thick pad, underwear and pants. Thank goodness I had a sweatshirt to tie around my waist. (P.S. My pregnant friends did not pee THEIR pants.)"
— Mia M., mom of two, Los Angeles
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Is That a Baby in Your Belly or ...
“I was sitting on the beach in Fire Island, six months' pregnant. I was wearing a bikini, and I have a tattoo on my stomach. A friend of a friend who stopped by to chat said, 'Wow, a stomach tattoo. What's going to happen if you get pregnant?' When I told him that I was, in fact, pregnant, he said, 'Oh, funny. I thought you just had a beer gut.'''
— Amy B., mom of one, New York
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The Moment You Know
“The first time I was pregnant, nothing tasted good for nine months. That’s how I knew I was pregnant again—I sat down to eat at work, took one bite and thought, 'Oh *@#!' I didn't even finish—I went to buy a pregnancy test. Randomly, I ran into a coworker and told her my story. She happened to be pregnant, too. I think that was the universe giving me a little support, don't you?”
— Kim S., mom of two, Los Angeles
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Orange Crush
"I started feeling sick at the mall, so I found a bench while my sister shopped. After a few minutes of breathing through my nose, I grabbed my bags and walked toward a trash can. A lady was leaning there, smoking, and I contemplated pushing her aside, but I spotted another one. I walked, jogged, then dropped my bags and started to all-out run—and reached it just in time to see my lunch gush out in a river of orange soda."
— Lisa F., mother of three, Portland
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How to Work the Waddle
“We were in Vegas. My husband wanted to head to the poker room after the 'Sirens' show—which meant going against traffic. So, I stuck out my belly, put one hand on my back and the other on my stomach and started to waddle, shouting, 'Coming through! Lady with a baby!' It took about three times—but we made it. I gave my husband a high five, and said, 'Now THAT’s how you get around in Vegas.'”
— Shoshana F., mom of one, Simi Valley, Calif.
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Busted
“I needed to get to a remote island in Alaska by float plane and was worried the pilot would reject me, so I wore a puffy down vest under a down coat and pretended I was naturally big. It worked, but then the pilot had to help me off the plane and I landed in his arms. He was shocked—but he couldn't really abandon a pregnant woman on an island with no hope of swimming back.”
— Nancy D., mom of two, Los Angeles
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Distracted
"I was at a spa with my wife, wearing my flip-flops. It was our babymoon. All of the sudden, a very attractive man caught my eye. He was so distracting that my flip-flop caught an edge and I fell, rolled and skidded to a complete stop. My wife asked me what happened; I told her, 'Yeah, I was looking at a hot guy.' Nothing got hurt except my ego."
— Paula G., mom of one, El Cerrito, Calif.
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Last in Line
"We had a philharmonic subscription when I was pregnant. The lines at intermission were long, and I would always let older women ahead of me, out of courtesy. As I got closer to my due date, I couldn't make it to intermission. I was huge and walked at an 80-year-old pace. They had no interest in letting me ahead of them in line, even though I was clearly in need. I got looks that said they'd paid their dues, [and] I can, too."
— Susan H, mom of two, Tampa, Fla.
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