What People Won’t Tell You About Your Kids

There are a few things that only a parent (and sometimes a pediatrician) will tell a kid. This is too bad, because these are things that kids need to know. It’s the rare stranger who tells you there is spinach in your teeth. So when it comes to your child’s body, accept that the buck stops with you and start a conversation. No one but you will tell your kid that he or she is …

They really won't, so teach your kid to get into the shower daily and to use the soap in there. While kids might want to skip the washcloth, let them know it's non-negotiable. Go ahead and offer one up.

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In fact, the worse the behavior, the less likely your child is to hear about it from anyone else. That is, until it hits a breaking point where it is so bad that suddenly the whole world is aghast. Teaching kids manners can be as simple as reminding them to say "please" and "thank you," and telling them how important it is to look others in the eye.

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Coaches can be helpful with this one, but only to a point. Since you live with your child, only you can really appreciate the massive degree of laziness that goes on day to day. Teach your child to turn off the device, get off the couch and start moving around. And because you are your child's most important example, you'll need to model the behavior by doing it yourself.

I am guilty of this crime as much as anyone: When taking my kids out to lunch with their pals, I have watched as one friend scarfs down a horrendous meal of fried something. Remember to expose your child to a variety of tastes—fruits, vegetables and otherwise. If you don’t teach your own child how to make good food choices, no one else is going to—even the pediatrician who is chaperoning the playdate.

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Everyone knows when someone hasn’t brushed her teeth. The great injustice is that we quickly acclimate to our own bad breath, so once we forget to do it, we are also often the last to realize. When your kid’s breath reeks, make her go back inside and brush. Really, you are doing her a favor.

Skid marks in underpants are embarrassing for everyone. But believe it or not, your kid doesn’t know why they are there until someone tells him. This is an important part of hygiene—particularly for girls, who can wind up with urinary tract infections.

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Even if someone else catches them, when kids lie it is up to their parents to have the conversation about it. If you miss this opportunity, you will regret it later as your child decides to test the theory that you are immune to all lies.

There is, in fact, something worse than your mom offering to take you bra shopping—your mom NOT offering. When your child starts to go through puberty, don’t ignore it! This is cruel. Talk about it, but do this privately and not at the family dinner table.

Don't get me wrong, parents should be cheerleaders for their kids. But there is a clear line between encouraging and exaggerating. There is nothing left to work toward if your 7-year-old thinks he is the world’s greatest … whatever it is. Find a way to break it to your trophy-collecting offspring that there are others who are working at a higher level, and that it is a fun challenge to try to get there.

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