We were married young — just 20 and 21 years old. We were still in school, working jobs that paid barely above minimum wage.
Thanks to our combined debt, we were pretty broke — a car payment, student loans, and, one of our worst moves: a large credit card balance because we charged our honeymoon.
After returning from our Caribbean getaway, we buckled down and mapped out a budget. We committed to discontinuing our credit card use and began aggressively paying off our debt.
Every spare dime went toward things we had committed to when living outside our means
Our big splurge each month was a visit to Applebee’s for happy hour wings. Sometimes a side of fries or French onion soup. Other than that, it was bare bones.
The lack of luxury and strict financial plans could lead many couples to fight. But for us, being broke was a blessing in disguise. Truly, I think it saved our marriage.
We talked about money every day
We analyzed our plan. We celebrated when something sold on Ebay or when I scored a favorite grocery item by stacking a sale with a coupon. We acknowledged our sacrifices: no fancy hair appointments for me, no new tools or fishing gear for him.
It was sad, but in a motivating way. We purposefully set our financial goals together because we had dreams, big dreams of being debt-free, buying a house, and starting a family. Sacrificing in the short-term would provide leeway in the future.
Money was tight and I’ll never say that was fun
But knowing we had to be strategic with our income drew us together as we worked toward a common goal. Rather than let it divide us, we used money as a tool to bring us together. We learned to be teammates. We learned to accept mistakes and give grace. We celebrated each month when we reassessed our budget and made note of our headway.
Being broke increased our communication. And, since we didn’t have extra funds for going out on the town, we spent a lot of time at home together. It taught us to appreciate the little things and especially one another.
We attacked our debt for 3 full years
First some small credit cards, then our car loan, then a number of different student loans. All in all, they totaled over $80,000. A staggering number, but one we chipped away at dollar by dollar.
To increase our payments on the particular loan we were working to pay off, we aimed to decrease our expenses and increase our income. I worked an extra job as a server and my husband officiated basketball in the fall and winter. We didn’t vacation and avoided shopping temptations. It took diligence and frequent conversations to direct each dollar, but we did it. Together.
Now, a decade later, we have less money stress. We aren’t broke, but we still live on a budget. In fact, our monthly budget meetings are some of our favorite date nights! Because we’re still teammates: financial partners, dreamers, doers. We learned early on to dive into the hard stuff together. And I’m so glad we did. So many things can crack a marriage. Money shouldn't be one of them.
