I didn't make a conscious choice to become a mother later in life. It's just the way things worked out. I had my daughter when I was 40 years old.
As with anything else, there are advantages and disadvantages.
I like that I have years of experience and perspective to draw from when facing parenting demands. I think I am better equipped to be a mom now than I was when I was younger. Having lived a fair amount of life, I have faced adversity, overcome obstacles and mastered many challenges.
I do not like when people mistake me for my child's grandmother. I cringe when my child makes sure to include three large lines across my forehead whenever she draws a picture of me. And I hate the impact peri-menopause is having on every aspect of my life, including parenting.
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I know women my age who have young children. But sometimes I feel very out of place. The other day, I put the following status on Facebook:
"You know you're a later in life mom when your friends are driving their kids to college, and you just dropped yours off for the first day of first grade."
It ended up being one of my most popular updates. Apparently, many could relate. So much so that when I asked them to complete the sentence, "You know you're an older mom when…" they had a lot to say:
"Your friends are posting pics of college graduations, engagement photos and new grandkids, and you are posting pics of your kids in grade school." —Kathy
"You're going through menopause before your daughter even starts her first period. OMG, did I just write that?" —Tracy
"Other moms are experiencing cramps, and you're experiencing hot flashes." —PJ
"All of your daughter's friends have moms 10 years younger than you." —Stacy
"You do the math and realize you're old enough to be your kid's teacher's mother." —Kristina
Your kids ask you if you remember what Prohibition was like.
"You've been asked about your grandkids when they are your kids. Sigh." —Denise
"You go straight for the tankini." —Sarah
"The parents of your children's classmates were born the year you graduated high school." —Paula
"You're planning your daughter's wedding, and the groom's mom looks 10 years younger than you." —Barbara
"Your sciatica acts up every time you put the kid in the crib. EVERY TIME." —Shelia
"Your kids ask you if you remember what Prohibition was like." —Alexandra
"You're constantly doing the math: When she's 20, I'll be…" —Amy
"You wear pajama pants for school drop-offs, because you lived through the first phase of that being a cool thing and it's been so long, surely it's about to make a comeback. And also you don't care anymore." —Maureen
"Your husband is bald." —Paul
"Or mostly grey." —Barb, Paul's wife
And this mom has a very interesting perspective:
"You know you've been having kids way too long when you have a college kid and a preschooler at the same time!" —Leslie
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Are you an "older" mom? What do you see as the pros and cons? How would you fill in the blank?
