Prince William’s Funniest Dad Jokes

After Kate Middleton's dad walked her down the aisle, William made a joke to settle everyone's nerves. According to a lip reader, he quipped to Michael Middleton, "We're supposed to have just a small family affair." Of course, their wedding was attended by nearly 2,000 guests and millions of people watched around the world.

He wasn't even a dad yet, and William was already making dad jokes!

Claire Jones, who played the harp at William and Kate's wedding reception, recently shared a joke that William made to her after the ceremony. "He said, 'Thank goodness Claire turned up to play the harp because otherwise, we'd have to get my brother to play it instead.'" Poor Harry! We'd listen to his harp skills.

A couple of years ago, Kate and William visited an air force base in Cyprus during the holiday season. The Princess of Wales had chosen a chic forest green blazer for the event, and William was quick to joke that she looked like a Christmas tree. "My wife's camouflaged against the tree," he said.

That she was.

On that same Cyprus visit, one of the photographers told William that he was blocking the tree in the pictures. William thought he meant that he was blocking Kate. "Why don't I just go?" he joked. Although people are probably very excited to see him at events, there's no doubt that Kate overshadows her husband at their engagements. Fortunately, unlike his dad, he can handle his wife's popularity.

When speaking to a street dancer, William mentioned that he doesn't have the skills for the art. (Gee, really?) "No breakdancing. If I were to break dance, I'd literally break myself!" he said. William recently turned 40 and his preferred form of exercise seems to be polo, so yeah, he shouldn't break himself breakdancing. We've seen him try to normal dance before, and even that was a lot.

Ireland's Guinness Storehouse is a popular spot for royals to visit. The late Queen Elizabeth went there in 2011, and a few years later, William and Kate did the same when on a royal tour of Dublin. William mentioned the Queen's visit in a speech, saying at the time, "Let me tell you, it is not often that I find myself following the Queen to a pub." Ha!

William started to lose his hair at a fairly young age, so he's now used to making jokes about balding. When talking to a hairdresser once, he quipped, "I don't have much hair. I can't give you much business." Laughter is one of the best coping mechanisms, and William fully leans into that method.

In another joke about his own balding, William told reporters after Prince George was born that "[he's] got way more hair than me, thank God!" For George's sake, we hope he has his mother's hair — it's so thick and luxurious. William is still handsome no matter how much hair he has, but he probably hopes his son will have better luck in that department.

William makes all his best dad jokes when answering the press's sometimes silly questions. Shortly after George was born, William cracked a joke about how coming out to speak to the media was taking him away from his father-son bonding. "It's the first time we have seen him really so we are having a proper chance to catch up," the prince said.

He added a joke apology for how long the reporters camped out to hear news of the birth. "I'll remind him of his tardiness when he's a bit older. I know how long you've all been standing here so hopefully the hospital and you guys can all go back to normal now and we can go and look after him."

William told CNN following George's birth, "As a few fathers might know, I'm actually quite looking forward to going back to work." Every job seems super hard until you have kids. Then you realize that a career that gives you nights and weekends off is actually the dream compared to how parenting is 24/7.

When William greeted fans who were camping out for Harry's wedding in 2018, one of them congratulated the prince on the recent birth of his third child, Prince Louis. "We are looking for a babysitter if you are all free!" William joked to the crowd. Of course, he and Kate have a nanny, so they're all set — but it was a funny joke.

When she was a new mother of three in 2018, Kate stayed home while William took a trip to Namibia. In a speech on the tour, William mentioned that she was super jealous of him for getting a break. "I'm looking forward to a few good, uninterrupted sleeps this week — away from my wonderful children," he joked. He loves his kids, but we can all relate to the relief that a couple of nights away can give.

William couldn't resist a parenting joke when Prince Harry and Meghan Markle first had their son, Archie. "I'm very pleased and glad to welcome my brother to the sleep deprivation society that is parenting," he said. It's not really a joke, because it's so true! In those early newborn days, we're all running on no sleep.

Check out our Meghan Markle page for all the latest news about Meghan, Prince Harry, and their growing family.

In 2020, William participated in a brief comedy sketch with Stephen Fry. It was right after Netflix's Tiger King had become such a sensation, and Stephen suggested that William spend some of his lockdown checking it out. "I tend to avoid shows about royalty," William quipped. Guess he hasn't seen The Crown either?

Since video chats only show the top half of your body, it became a bit of a joke that people would conduct their meetings without pants on. William made a similar joke in his sketch with Stephen Fry, saying that he planned to go outside to clap for essential workers as soon as he located some of his clothing. "Let me just see if I can find my socks, and my shoes, and my trousers," he said. Don't worry, he did.