It’s been almost a year since Jennette McCurdy’s striking memoir, I’m Glad My Mom Died, came out, but she isn’t done sharing disturbing stories about her childhood. Speaking on the Louis Theroux Podcast, McCurdy revealed that her late mother showered her and gave her “vaginal and breast exams” until she was 18 years old.
Jennette, now 31, revealed that her mom, Deb McCurdy, would stand in the shower fully clothed, “shampooing and conditioning” the young girl’s hair and also washing her body.
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According to McCurdy, Deb’s reasoning for the exams were that she was “just checking for cancer.” Deb had been diagnosed with cancer and was extremely paranoid about it.
Jennette knew that what her mother did wasn’t normal or typical — she said the acts made her feel “uncomfortable” and “violated.” And when she asked for some autonomy, it was not well received.
“I knew I didn’t want it, but the one time I had attempted to even say, ‘Hey, do you think I could shower myself?’ she flew into hysterics, and it just became clear to me I can’t ever try to shower myself again,” Jennette said.
After her mom was diagnosed with cancer for a second time, Jennette said the diagnosis is what ultimately gave her some freedom. Jennette had begun a singing career and was going on tour, but Deb had to stay behind for chemo treatments.
“She physically could not be with me, and that was I think the only reason why I was able to finally start showering myself,” she said.
Jennette tried to rationalize her mother’s actions during the interview, attributing them to her lack of “boundaries,” a “fear of me growing,” and a sense of “ownership” over Jennette and her body.
In her memoir, Jennette was candid about the role her mother played in her suffering from various eating disorders for much of her childhood and early 20s. After she started developing breasts, which her mother saw as a sign of impending adulthood, she started forcing Jennette to restrict calories.
She explained, “It had always been really clear to me that my mom did not want me to grow up, not just for acting, but it also felt like her worth was tied up in me being young.”
Deb “weighed me daily, and she measured my thighs with a measuring tape. She taught me what diuretics were, and we read calorie books together and constantly were just in this kind of as partners in crime.”
In late 2022, McCurdy appeared on Red Table Talk to promote her book. During the appearance, she read an excerpt revealing that her mom made her shower with one of her older brothers until he was 16 and she was 11.
“I get really embarrassed when she showers us together. I can tell he does too. … Scotty asked if he could shower himself [on his] own once. Mom sobbed and said she didn’t want him to grow up, so he never asked again after that,” Jennette said.
When asked about how this affected their relationship, Jennette explained that she and her siblings have a “beautiful bond” because of the trauma they experienced at the hands of their mother.
During the Theroux podcast, Jennette explained that she “idolized” and “adored" her mother growing up, which allowed her to overlook much of the abusive behavior. She said that she quit working with a therapist who suggested that her mother’s behavior was abusive.
“I just kind of kept clinging to, ‘Oh, well. Mom’s doing this because it’s what’s best for me,'” she explained.
