Bringing a baby into the world is one of the best things that will ever happen to you. I remember not being able to wait to meet my first son, and when he was finally in my arms, I loved him so much it was physically painful. However, that postpartum time period was still one of the hardest things I’ve ever done and I wasn’t prepared for the way my mind and body felt after I gave birth to him. I had no idea about the mood swings, my doughy stomach, how hard breastfeeding would be, and how much I would miss my life before him.
But the thing was, despite all the difficult parts, the fourth trimester wasn't all that bad. In case you're only hearing the bad stuff, just know there are so many wonderful, beautiful moments that happen during this time, too.
Such as…
1. It’s the best excuse in the world to sleep and lie down as much as you can
There's no need to keep up with a routine, answer emails, check your phone, or get dressed. You have the perfect reason to get as much rest as humanly possible, live in your bathrobe, and not lift a finger around the house — and you should take advantage of that.
2. People want to help you — please ask for it
This is the time to ask for whatever you need. Your friends, family, and coworkers want to help make your life easier. Sometimes, they just aren’t sure what to do. You have to be willing to ask them for what you need. Trust me, it will make them happy to drop off meals, get takeout for you, watch your other kids, or just text back and forth if you need to vent or talk. Take advantage of their efforts. It will make your life easier.
3. There is nothing better than snuggling with your newborn
Some of my fondest memories are drifting off with my sleeping baby next to me. Their smell is intoxicating and you feel like you are the only two in the world at times. It feels so magical to just be in the moment and appreciate this new life.
4. It shows how amazing you are
Is there anything more amazing than giving birth and raising a child? After all of my kids were born, I was still in disbelief that I was able to do that. Being a mother is the most challenging job in the world. Becoming a mom is empowering and makes you stronger and more resilient each day.
5. It can be a wonderful time to bond with your partner
Yes, it can be hard and stressful on a relationship — you are both worn out and tired. But the truth is, you are going through this together. You are both struggling and doing everything in your power to make it work. It takes teamwork and showing up for each other. There will be times you are both so overtired that everything will be hysterical and you’ll realize nothing is more important than the moment you are in.
I found that with my children’s father, when I was having a weak moment (which was often), he was up for the challenge and stepped up. It definitely strengthened our bond.
The 4th trimester is a huge mixed bag of emotions
One minute you're feeling great, the next you can’t get off the sofa and are sobbing while trying to feed your child. It's possible to be going through a challenging time and still experience some of the most magical moments of your life.
Remember to give yourself grace and realize that feeling like you're doing the impossible is completely normal. It won’t be long before the newborn stage will be over and you'll look back and think, if I made it through the 4th trimester, I can make it through anything.
