What to Know
How much is too much when it comes to giving your kids the best Christmas, or best holiday season, possible? We like to tell ourselves that it’s not the amount of gifts, or the nature of the physical gifts, that really matter, but let’s be real. We all want to see our kids’ faces light up after tearing open a box with their favorite new toy in it. But the other reality is that, in many cases, they might toss that box aside and dive into the pile under the tree for more, more, and more.
And that’s when you realize you’ve created an actual monster. When one mom shared a video on Instagram where she quizzes her daughter on her favorite gift from the previous Christmas, she sort of proves this.
Not the monster part, because the teen is a total sweetheart, but the meaninglessness behind some physical gifts that kids receive, regardless of their age. She admits that she can’t remember what she got as a gift, but she does remember the last family trip together.
She couldn’t name one physical gift she received last year.
The mom in the Instagram video, Andrea, tells her daughter, “Name three gifts that you got for Christmas last year.” When her daughter can’t do that, she asks, “Where did we take our family vacation this year?” immediately, her daughter has the answer. To be fair, a week-long vacation with numerous memories might stick out harder in someone’s memory than opening a pair of Nikes at 5 a.m. on Christmas morning.
However, the idea here is that some kids might actually prefer just being with family, and getting your time and undivided attention, even if they don’t yet realize it.
“Yes!!” Someone wrote under the Instagram video. “They want memories not things! I keep trying to tell my husband to let’s normalize going on vacation for Christmas and skip the gifts!!”
Others chimed in to suggest a happy medium.
This is especially true for younger kids, who don’t quite understand why it’s not a great idea to rely on getting hordes of gifts every year. Another user pointed out that some kids receive gifts, or little trinkets, so much throughout the year now that Christmas isn’t quite as special as it might have been to 90’s kids. Fair.
Someone else in the comments pointed out that you can still give physical gifts, but that there should be more thought behind them rather than focusing on quantity.
“I remember many gifts I opened as a child on Christmas,” they wrote. “It depends on the person. Gift giving is how I show love. It’s not always a negative to do presents or about materialism. I agree with your sentiment, but when gifts are more about thoughtfulness it can be positive.”
Depending on your child, and really, on your family, maybe there is that one special gift your kid can remember. The idea isn’t to totally get rid of physical gifts. I’m not the Grinch here, OK? But leaning into experiences isn’t a bad idea either, especially as kids get older. It also teaches them not to rely so heavily on that fleeting feeling of instant gratification.
